Home Again

This morning it felt good to be back home in Somero after what was an intense weekend. The round trip up north is more than 1200km, and in two days that's quite a bit of driving. The roads in Finland are good and luckily the weather wasn't bad either but I'm still not planning to go for a drive today.

Luca, Niko and Minttu

One of the nicest things about where we live is that the river which runs through Somero is only about 300m from our house. Our little rowing boat means that over the summer we can go rowing whenever we feel like it. To many Finns this is quite a normal thing to do.

However, having grown up in London, the only experience I had of rowing as a child was on a rented boat on the Serpentine in Hyde Park. That certainly felt very exotic at the time, so now, to be able to walk down to the river and get in our own boat will always feel special.

Today though we had no choice than to pull the boat onto land for the winter. The water level in the river has fallen dramatically recently and it won't be too long before it freezes over. The boat is pretty heavy, but luckily we have plenty of manpower in the family. Of course I delegated the task to the strong ones who had it on dry land in no time....
Now that the clocks have gone back, people will soon start putting lights in their gardens and windows in the run up to Christmas. So this morning we also put our cherry tree full of lights at the front of the house to brighten up the dark evenings. I think most Finns would say that November is their least favourite month. Principally because it's usually dark and wet and the snow hasn't yet arrived. But our hope is to make this a good November. If there's no light in the sky then we just have to be more determined to make some of our own.  :-)

Highs and Lows

Saturday night, and I'm with Lucie and Cameron in Lumijoki, just 40 km from Oulu in the north of Finland. It's cold here, but Lumijoki is the only place in the world where our family has real roots, so it always feels a bit like coming home.

It's been an eventful week in many ways, one full of highs and lows. On the low side I haven't been well for most of the week (an old illness back to haunt me once again) and today we're up in Lumijoki seeing my Mum. It's hard to believe that just a year ago my Mum was living independently at home with my Dad. A year later, Dad is gone and my Mum was struck with such sudden dementia that she no longer knows who we are. On the merciful side, as far as my mother is concerned, Dad is still sleeping in the next room, so at least she does not have to grieve at his loss. Dad would have been pleased at that, I know.


Anyone who has ever had a friend or relative with Alzheimer's will know that it is quite disconcerting to be physically with someone you know well, but who is there and not there at the same time. It's a cruel disease.

Still, there have been high points too. I loved meeting our Somero visitors on Tuesday, and later that afternoon I was in Helsinki where I met some inspirational new people whom I hope will become friends.

Later in the week we had several little bits of good news...and the squirrels have visited every day to keep me entertained while I'm sitting at my desk at home staring out the window.

Today we stopped in Ylivieska and met up with my old friend Minna. Minna and I met more than ten years ago in a court room in Darlington and were immediately bonded by our Finnish roots. We then spent the next five years in the UK fantasizing about one day living in Finland again. We used to talk about all the Finnish food we missed. Now we are both here it sometimes all feels a bit surreal, and of course now it's the other way round. We sit and talk about all the things we miss from the UK. Maltesers, Minstrels, Double Deckers, Chery Bakewells, sticky toffee pudding, custard, CHOCOLATE FUDGE CAKE.....  Who knows what the next ten years has in store.

There are bound to be twists and turns ahead. Good times and more challenging ones. But I guess all any of us can do is to savour all the good things and face the challenging ones as best we can. For my part, I'm going to bed tonight thinking of sticky toffee pudding, squirrels, family and friends, old and new. Because they are the things that have made this week good.

  

British and Swedish visitors learn the Finnish tango

This week we had the pleasure in Somero of welcoming a group of around thirty visitors from both the UK and Sweden. They were visiting as part of an economic regeneration project in which they were looking at how local food producers operate in the three countries.

Over the past twelve months the group had already visited Sweden and the UK, so the visit to Finland was the last leg of the project.

Tonja from Monokas welcomes the group

As well as being introduced to local producers, the groups were also shown aspects of our local culture, and of course no group could come to Somero without being shown our dance tradition here.

Having arrived late the night before, the group were taken to Esakallio (which was freezing now the heating has been turned off for the winter!) and told a little about the Finnish dancehall tradition,

before being whisked off to Lamminiemi to try their hands (and feet) at the Finnish tango.

Everyone took it in very good spirit, and I hope that some may come back one day to experience one of Somero's dance camps.

Everyone who visited was very friendly, and I only wish they had been able to stay longer. But hopefully some of them will make it back to Somero again one day and we can show them some Somero sunshine. Wishing all the members of the group a safe journey back home and we would be very happy to welcome you back here one day soon!

Can't hide the truth this time...

Somero town centre on Saturday afternoon

Over the past few months I have very much enjoyed being contacted by many people to whom Somero is important, but who do not live here at the moment. Some have been visitors to the town and some have summer cottages here. Others were born here or have lived here later in life but are currently somewhere else in the world.

What all these people have in common though, is that they have never left this town completely behind. It still remains important to them, and they have enjoyed seeing pictures of familiar places.

Of course, when I post photos of Somero,  most of the time I try to take photos which capture a pretty scene or a beautiful moment. Sometimes though there is no escaping the brutal truth!

The view from our front door yesterday

Today, I am happy to say, is another clear and frosty autumn morning.

But yesterday it was a different story. In the middle of the afternoon we were entertained by a blizzard of hail, and it wasn't pretty. I stopped in the middle of town to take a couple of pictures of places that will be very familiar to anyone who has been to Somero. This is what you have missed this weekend!

I don't know whether these pics will make you miss Somero, or glad that you are somewhere else, in better weather, but either way...you will recognise the centre of town.

So, to anyone who is missing Somero right now, this is what it looked like yesterday. Luckily the warmth of the people will always make up for the weather, even on days like yesterday. Hope to see some of you again soon!

Little acorns...big ideas

I thought the frost on this tree stump was beautiful

The view out of the window ths morning was like something from a fairytale. There was a sparkling blanket of frost which covered everything in sight. It was cold too, and the first time this year that I have needed to wear my winter coat.

Collecting acorns this morning

We decided to go for an early morning walk and collect a bag full of acorns. Along the main road in Somero are several oak trees. Acorns have been lying on the ground for a few weeks now, and it seems as though the jays and squirrels don't dare to collect them, probably because there is too much traffic around.

The last time I collected some acorns for the squirrels they had a party for several days, collecting them individually and then hiding each one in a different place. I have no idea how they will know how to find them again, especially when we are under a metre of snow, but I guess they have their methods.



one of our garden squirrels eating from the breakfast buffet

There is a jay (närhi) who also visits whenever there are acorns on offer. He never stays for long, and although I have tried more than once to get a picture I haven't succeeded yet. I am hoping that the new acorns will tempt him to visit some time later today. 

When I was growing up in London I never saw anything other than pigeons or sparrows, which is one of the reasons why watching the birds in the garden will always feel so special to me.

I have also always liked acorns, not just because they remind us all of nature, but because of the idea that big things can grow from something which starts off small. (Mighty oaks from little acorns grow.)

In fact I have just read a book this week which says that we should write down every idea we have. This way they won't get lost amidst all the other stuff going on in our heads. I am sure this is good advice and now have a notebook for that very reason.  I have been feeling very inspired recently (largely thanks to several inspirational friends of mine) so I will jot down my ideas in the hope that some day I will manage to make at least one of them happen. With more than three kilos of acorns collected this morning you never know when another oak tree might start to grow. Happy weekend everyone.


Friendship beats the winter blues

I am still getting over the shock of seeing the first snowflakes of this winter earlier today. However I am pleased to stay they didn't last long. Instead, I had the pleasure of watching two squirrels chasing each other round a tree and then a blazing fire roaring in the fireplace.

Apart from the imminent start of winter though, the big theme of the last two days has been one of friendship. Yesterday it was the birthday of two of my close friends, Manu and Heidi. Happy birthday both of you! 

Then today I received a surprise message from an old student friend of mine who is now working in Ethiopia. I promised Tedi that one day I will turn up in Addis Ababa and surprise him back. And I think the Finnish winter would be an excellent time to make that happen.

Then I arrived home to find that one of my neighbours, Anne, had come round to help with sweeping up the leaves in the garden and an another Anne turned up for a coffee and a chat. So despite the snow and the cold air outside, the house has been warm, both because of the fire and the friends around us at the moment.

I guess that sometimes, when you can't sit in the sun outside, you have to find sunshine in other ways, and I am happy to say we have found plenty of that this week. With special greetings this time from Somero to Ethiopia! Thank goodness friendship doesn't recognise distance. Or winter for that matter. Real friendship just is, whatever.

Noooooooooooooo!

Just looked out of the kitchen window and I didn't like what I saw.

But there is no denying it anymore. I can be as positive as I like, but I'm not going to get the sumemr back this year.

IT'S SNOWING!!!!

Somebody do something, please!

Scrunching

I have a good friend, Simon, who lives in Bristol and is a writer. We met in a most unexpected way at the end of last year and have been friends ever since. One of the things we have in common  is our shared love of words, and the way they can make you feel if used in the right way.

Simon is a much more talented writer than I am...he is one of those people with an annoyingly big talent in fact. He can take a boring subject and make it worth reading about, simply by the words he chooses to use.

(OH...and Jane Griffiths...you're the other person I know with this same talent. Things that you write are also worth reading just because you have written them).

Anyway, this morning Simon had sent me a message on Facebook about the leaves story I posted on the blog yesterday. Simon says that the leaves are being slow to fall in England, which means he can't "scrunch" in them yet as he is walking.

I don't know when I have last used or heard the word "scrunch".....but I have to say that hearing it this morning has already brightened up my whole day. There simply can't be many better words than that. SCRUNCH. Love it.

My friend Simon

And quite apart from that, I have decided that today is going to be a good one. Apart from the open tin of sweetcorn which fell out of the fridge onto the floor this morning and went everywhere that is.

Just a few minutes ago I stood underneath the oak tree in our garden and caught nine falling leaves before they hit the ground. I put them in my diary and made several wishes straightaway. And I also put a couple aside for a rainy day. Come to think of it, I think I will send one magic leaf to Simon, to thank him for reminding me of the word scrunch. I hope you too will have a day full of scrunching, irrespective of whether the leaves have fallen yet or not where you are. Happy autumn to you all!

Happy Moments

If there was a competition on my street to see who had raked up the most leaves, then I would definitely come last. But then if there was a competition to see who had enjoyed them the most, then I think our family might do quite well!

At the moment the front yard looks as though it's covered by a leaf carpet. I think it's beautiful to be honest, but it might well be that the neighbours think differently.

Anyway, one of the reasons, (apart from sheer laziness) that I have left things as they are, is that I wanted to get some pictures of the little ones playing in the leaves... and this morning I caught this one. I love it because it is so full of joy. The only bad thing is that now I don't have any excuses left...looks like I'm going to be spending the afternoon raking. I'm not complaining though, as this is one of the loveliest autumns I can remember. Here's wishing you happy moments doing simple things, wherever you might be.

When you don't need words

Much as I love words, in any language, sometimes conversation can be even more powerful without needing to use them at all.

I had lunch with Lucie this afternoon who told me a touching little story.  She was walking back from the health centre to the middle of town when she saw an elderly couple sitting on a bench in their garden.

The two of them sat there for a few minutes without speaking. They seemed quite content as they sat together in the autumn breeze. Then the man slowly put his hand on his wife's knee.  They looked at each other and smiled. Then they both stood up and picked up their rakes so that they could carry on raking up the leaves in their garden.  And off they went.

When Lucie told me this, I loved her little story of unspoken companionship and understanding. And even more than that, I loved the fact that she had both noticed and taken the trouble to tell me about it.

In amongst all the couples who don't have that special connection anymore, there are still a few who do. I am lucky enough to know a handful of couples like this myself (Jill and Michael, Marja-Leena and Kari...I am talking about you!) They, like this couple in the garden this afternoon, are the ones who give the rest of us hope that lifelong love does still exist, however rare it may seem nowadays.

So to those of you feeling alone or a little despondent....don't give up. Love is still out there, and there's still four months to go until Valentine's Day. So keep believing, you never know what is round the corner.....

Lucky Leaves

As I went outside this morning I looked at the trees and then at the ground, and my guess is that we are at about fifty fifty. Half the leaves are just about still in the trees and the other half have fallen already.

After the cold mornings of last week, it felt like a perfect autumn morning to me today. There was a light smattering of rain, a gentle breeze and at 12 degrees it didn't feel too cold at all.

Many years ago, a wise friend of mine from the Netherlands (hello Herman!) said that every once in a while we should all make sure we go out and walk in the rain. He said we it was important to take opportunities to go and feel close to nature, because it helped put other things that might be bothering us into perspective.

That conversation was a long time ago, but every time I see a beautiful rainy morning like this, those words come back to me. He was right. It feels good to feel the rain on your face every once in a while.

 

When I got back home from town I was amused to find a pheasant wandering around in the garden. Of course I grabbed my camera, but it wasn't in the mood to be photographed and ran off though the bushes into the field next door. (but I got him later...as you can see from this photo!)

What I did manage to get though, was this magic leaf. It is magic because it has never touched the ground. I caught it just as it fell from the tree. I have heard that some people believe that catching such a leaf brings seven years good luck. In our family we count falling leaves as giving us a wish. I've made mine already and will kepp this leaf as a reminder of it. Wherever you are, I wish you a day full of positive things and hope that you catch at least one falling leaf this autumn.

Big Brothers

Minttu and big brother Niko

My friend Minna rang me this evening. We speak to each other almost every day. As it turned out, we were both feeling a little bit blue, so we did what we normally do when this happens. We asked each other about the highlight of the day.

Until that point I hadn't actually given it any thought. I was concentrating on all the things that were bothering me. But she had asked the question so I took a minute to think about my answer.

"Well actually, there were a few things, now I come to think about it," I said. "I had three books which I needed from the library. I'd expected that I'd have to order them in, but as it turned out all three were there on the shelves, which meant I could get on with a piece of coursework I am doing. In addition I finally managed to find some paperwork I'd been looking for, and also I finished a piece of work that's been bugging me for a while."

"Well that's quite a lot then", Minna said. She was right. But as I thought about it, there was more. Lucie was cooking pasta bolognese for dinner.  I had also bumped into a friend this afternoon in Somero whom I hadn't seen for a while and we'd arranged to go for coffee. Later in the evening my neighbour Anne also turned up out of the blue and brought candles and chocolate because she wanted to cheer me up. We ended up deciding to hold a coffee morning next week for some elderly people in the town, which should be fun. And I'd managed to do another five things on my list of things to do. So not a bad day, in fact.

Apart from those days when something serious happens, (and that's not often really), most days have plenty of good stuff in them - if you just remember to think about those things.

I have always wished that I had brothers and sisters, but particularly a big brother. In my dreams my "big brother" would have looked out for me and been there to lean on in good times and bad. Obviously I will never know what he would or wouldn't have been like. What's for sure though, is that if I spend the rest of my life wishing I had a big brother, I will spend every day disappointed, because I simply haven't got one. If, instead, I remember to concentrate on all the friends I have, and the children at home, having no siblings won't feel like much of an issue anymore.  

So in the end, despite its imperfections, today was a pretty good day, something I remembered thanks to talking to Minna. I am also happy that little Minttu will never have any concerns over not having a big brother...she has four of them...and as you can see from the picture, Niko, at least, will always be around with his faithful dog Benjy to make sure his little sister is ok.

Thank You Anita

Do you know that feeling, when you desperately want to do something....you have an idea which you feel is a good one...but no matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to get it done?

Anita Hallapelto

Well I know that feeling really well. I have always been someone who often has new ideas, and sometimes there is one I would really like to make a reality. Recently though, perhaps because of everything that has been going on, I have found it almost impossible to finish anything. I have started things, but then haven't found enough energy to finish it. I don't like this at all, but having spoken to several others I know that I am not the only one who sometimes finds herself in this position.

Anyway, I am happy to say that this is now starting to change. This week I have been working on completing projects that I started a while ago as well as starting some new ones. And it feels really good to finally have some energy and enthusiasm back again.

How did this happen, then? Well, one of the things that helps me when I am stuck is to surround myself with positive  people. When I am lacking my own motivation and drive, I move towards other people who have those things, and I find that their energy for life is almost always contagious.

The reason for that introduction is because Anita, the lady in the photo, is exactly one of those people. She is one of the most positive people I have ever had the good fortune to meet.  Anita and I met earlier this year through our shared love of dance. She runs a shop in Somero called "Helmi" which sells vintage style clothing, and as there are three large dance venues in Somero (Ämyri, Esakallio and Teeriharju) many people go to Helmi to buy dresses for dancing.

Anita, me and members of Monokas dance group at the Turku Book Fair

But there is another reason that people go to Anita's shop. It is because of her. Anita is one of those people who is always smiling, radiates positivity and always has something good to say both to and about other people. Sometimes I go to Helmi to buy a new dress or outfit, but more often than that I go with a couple of doughnuts and stay for a chat about anything that is going on. Plenty of other people do exactly the same. Anita has listened to both good and bad news and we have both laughed and cried together. She has also given me a hug more times than I can remember. But one thing is for certain. Everyone always leaves Anita's shop feeling better than when they went in.

Anita in her shop

Yesterday I joined Anita and other members of the dance club Monokas in a dance and fashion show at the Turku Book Fair. It was a new experience for me to dance anything other than salsa in front of an audience, but it turned out to be great fun and I didn't fall over thanks to my partners Kari, Markku and Arto.

So my message this Sunday to you is this. If you are feeling a bit "stuck" at the moment, or lacking in energy or motivation, go and spend some time with someone who is feeling the opposite. Someone who believes in you, wants you to succeed and chooses to focus on the positive in life. These are the kind of people who will help you find your own drive and enthusiasm again. I know it worked for me. Thank you Anita for your endless optimism, enthusiasm and endlessly positive outlook on life....you were there just when I needed you. I hope you know that you bring something very valuable to Somero and I am sure that everyone who knows you feels the same. Wishing you all a happy Sunday!

Somero at the Turku Book Fair

I am off to the Turku Book Fair in a few minutes, where Somero has a prominent role this year as the Finnish town chosen to be featured for 2013.

I have always loved books and was lucky to grow up in a house where I was surrounded by them. I have often thought what a different place the world would be without the opportunities and enjoyment that books provide.

I don't have my own book there yet (still in production!) but I do have a series of twenty postcards at the fair which just arrived from the printers' yesterday. To me, writing a postcard to someone you care about has always been a good things to do, but has even more meaning nowdays than it did in the past. In this day of text messaging, emails and communicating through Facebook, (all of which can of course be good things) writing and receiving cards and letters has attained even more significance. I know that anytime I go to the post box and there is something there other than a bill or official letter, it brightens my day much more than the person who wrote it could ever realise.  Now I have several boxes of postcards waiting to be written.....if anyone out there would like to receive a card from Somero just let me know and I will happy to put one in the post!

Anyway...must go pretty soon, but here are some pictures from Somero's stand at the fair....hope to see some of you there!

Autumn Skies

One of the most useful things I have learned over the years is the value of writing gratitude lists. Every single one of us has things to be grateful for - and actually the point isn't even which things you choose to include on your list - the point is remembering to focus on them. My lists include everything from the good health of my children to simply enjoying a cold drink or watching the fire on a chilly autumn night.

Today I spent a fruitful, but long, day in Helsinki.

We were all up early this morning and I got my first blast of winter as I went out to the car and saw that it was minus five degrees. Yuck. The heavy traffic meant that I spent three and a half hours in the car getting to the capital and back.

On the plus side, I had the time to listen to lots of music and also talk to friends on the phone. However on my gratitude list this evening I have also included that living in Somero means that I do not have to fight the Helsinki traffic every day. And I am certainly grateful for that.

Once I'd picked the children up from nursery, we went for a drive to take a few photos and we were rewarded by some magnificent skies above Somero.

I stared at the pinks and blues and oranges in the sky and thought how beautiful the world is when you just remember to look at it sometimes.

So here is how Somero looked just a couple of hours ago. Peaceful, autumnal and not a traffic jam in sight. In my book that's a lot to be grateful for.

They can't take hope away from you.....

Have you ever had one of those days when all of a sudden several people from the past pop up at the same time? For no particular reason that you can see?

Well I'm having one of those weeks, actually. In the last three days I have had calls or messages from no less than nine people whom I haven't been in touch with for several months at least.

It has been lovely to be back in touch with several old friends, but I can't help wondering at times like these whether it's just a coincidence or something more that so many people should be in touch at the same time. It isn't the first time that something like this has happened. On occasions such as birthdays, Christmas or New Year, there is an obvious explanation. But none of those things are relevant at the moment.
Maybe it's the weather? Sometimes a change in season makes us reassess where we are going in life and think about people we used to know. Or perhaps it is something completely different. Perhaps there is something out there that we don't even know about.

A year ago this week the whole world of our family was turned upside down. All I could really think about at the time was survival. We needed to find somewhere to live and beds to sleep in. I had children who depended on me. Some days I felt so lost I could hardly find the energy to do normal things, let alone enjoy anything.

But a year later and everything feels entirely different. Despite the challenges of the past twelve months and losing some beloved people on the way - I still can't help thinking how lucky we are.  We have somewhere new to live which finally now feels like home. We have been surrounded by friendship throughout the whole process - and having achieved nothing at all over the summer, the autumn has brought with it new energy and motivation which has enabled me to finally start some new projects...and it feels exciting!


Somero in September..to remind you what it looks like Mihaela!

Those who have experienced depression will know just how overwhelming it can feel at times. It can feel as though you are buried beneath a pile of rocks. You know you should try and dig your way out but you don't even know where to start. Even moving the first tiny stone feels almost impossible. So you do nothing except exist. And the fact that you can't motivate yourself to do anything makes you feel worse...so your sense of self worth becomes almost non-existant and you wonder why you are even here. Know the feeling? It may sound dramatic to those who have never experienced what I am talking about, but I am quite sure that many of you reading this will know exactly what I mean. Hopeless days feel exactly that - hopeless.

I suppose what I want to say, is that it isn't hopeless, however much it might feel like that sometimes. Sure, life is full of unexpected twists and turns. At times it feels rotten and unfair - and as though we are being punished for something we don't even understand. But there are always better days ahead...if you can just hold on to the belief that they will come.

I have learned over the past twleve months that friendship is one of the most valuable things in the world. Sometimes a call from a friend is the only thing that gets you through the day, even if the friend doesn't even know it.  I have learned that learning to love again is possible, even when you are convinced it is not. I have discovered that when families stick together and help each other they can get through almost anything. And most of all I have learned that hope is the one thing that no-one can take away from you. So keep tight hold of it. Keep dreaming, whatever you are going through. Keep believing that better things are ahead. Because one day you will wake up and realise that in fact that is exactly what has happened. The worst is behind you, your old energy is starting to come back and the future is starting to look bright again - and those are the days when you glad you stuck around - and old friends start to look you up again....it's a strange world after all.