Reassurance

I attended a lecture last week in which one of the topics was cultural differences - and particulalry how they can be seen through language and words. As someone who lives in a country where the language spoken is not my own mother tongue, I found this really interesting. It is true that quite often I find myself in a situation where I would like use Finnish to express something which is easy to say in English, but the right words just aren't there. And that's frustrating.

I've mentioned a few of these in previous posts. There is no word for "please" in Finnish, which is difficult enough for any non-Finn who has been brought up to be polite. There is also no obvious way to say "I'm impressed", which is something I have often used as an English reaction to hearing about someone else's achievement. Another lady at the lecture said she was frustrated that there wasn't an appropriate word in Finnish to express the word "cherish."  That wasn't one that I had missed personally, but she had been frustrated by the limitations of he own language on several occasions.

For me personally, the word that has bothered me the most is "reassurance". And particularly so this week. I mentioned at the lecture that there are not many English speaking women who at one time or another have not needed "reassurance", (at least the women I have met). But a good enough word for this just doesn't exist in Finnish. I have no idea why. One Finnish woman at the lecture said that in her view, Finnish women were strong and capable and didn't find themselves needing reassurance very often. Personally, I think that's a load of nonsense. I think almost all of us need reassurance from time to time, wherever we come from. Certainly women are more likely to say so out loud than men, but I don't believe that Finnish women are any more immune to needing reassurance that any other women are.

I have to admit that if I could get some reassurance from somewhere right now, I would do quite a lot in order to get it. I seem to be caught in a whirlwind of things I have no control over at the moment and I just want someone to give me a big hug and reassure me that everything will be ok. And I would like to be able to say that in Finnish without searching half an hour for the right word. Which doesn't exist.

Still, as I sit here looking out of the window into the garden, I was just about to write that at least our woodpecker has come back for a visit, and somehow that little thing is reassuring in itself. But just as I started to write the words - a second woodpecker appeared, which is rare indeed, and kind of symbolic right at this moment. Then my favourite garden bird, the jay (närhi), also appeared - so maybe someone is trying to tell me something.

I don't have the reassurance I need right now....in more than one area of my life. But I am fairly sure many of you will be feeling the same. Perhaps, for now, we need to believe that something or someone is taking care of us somewhere out there, however vulnerable we may feel at times. And while we wait for things we have no control over, it may do us good to concentrate on the things that are here, like the birds in the garden, or the fact that the sun is shining in November, or that a friend is never more than a phone call away. And if you are in a position to reassure someone you know...perhaps today would be a good day to do so. If they are Finnish and haven't said they need any, it's probably just because a good enough word doesn't exist yet.