WHY?

Today was a day spent with friends.... people I truly value. And I should be going to bed this evening feeling contented, But I'm not.

My friends Anna-Liisa, Kirsti and I saw a film called Twelve Years a Slave. It was based on the true story of Solomon Northup, a man sold into slavery, who escaped after twelve years and wrote a book about his experiences.

Coming out of the cinema I felt very quiet, as I think many others did too. I will never begin to understand how human beings treat each other the way they do. But I am not just talking about the extreme example of people being sold into slavery in the 1800s.

I spent almost ten years in the family law courts, then worked in the European Court of Human Rights and have also studied human rights law. All three dealt with cruelty and injustice on all sorts of different levels.  Unjustifiable behaviour towards others is occurring in every country and every city of the world. All the time. Not a hundred years ago, but now.

When future historians come to review the world as it is today... what will they say in their films about us? Us. A people spending billions on the Olympics and space travel and creating the next line of face cream - when half the world still doesn't have clean water to drink. A world where half the world is obsessed with botox and breast implants while the other half is mourning dead family members - because they weren't vaccinated against preventable diseases like malaria.  Are we going to be depicted as the most selfish and egotistical race ever to exist?

And why, in one of the most advantaged states in the world, are Finns so used to hearing stories of another person taking his or her own life? Could it perhaps be that in a state where in theory we have everything, so many people still feel alone and insignificant - because as a community we don't take the time and effort to make everyone feel that they matter?

Why, when you ask someone how they are, are you considered to be a "really good friend?"

Shouldn't caring about other people, and looking after them the best we can, be our natural way of being? Instead it seems we spend time criticising and judging others and trying to pull people down - when actually we have no idea what they have been through or how they are feeling about anything.

I am not asking for answers to these questions. But I nevertheless feel they need to be asked. If each of us genuinely cared about the welfare of others, the world would be transformed in an instant. As it is, I feel as though the films made in the future, about life in 2014, are going to leave their audiences just as appalled as I felt when leaving the cinema this afternoon.

Husbands at ABC

As the weekend starts once again, I am sitting at home on Friday evening, enjoying the quietness of the house.

It's been a busy day with the little ones. Fairly normal stuff...including Minttu flamenco dancing on the table and playing memory games on the floor (with Niko dressed as a chimpanzee).

Niko has not stopped talking about weddings this week. It started off with him saying that he was planning to marry me. When I told him that this wasn't possible, he wanted to know why. Of course I explained that you couldn't marry someone from your own family.

He then suggested marrying both Minttu and Luca, before he finally accepted that marrying either your mother or your sibling was NOT ok.

Having now taken on this piece of bad news, Niko was still not going to be stopped. He was a man on a mission. In the space of one week, he proposed to almost everyone at his nursery, my good friend and neighbour Anne, as well as Airi from the neuvola (children's clinic). (I think most of them said yes actually, so he will have some big decisions to make soon).

Niko did not stop there however. He also gave me some fairly strong opinions about my own marital status. According to him I should marry immediately. We then had some interesting conversations about who this would be with. Having now realised that he could not be my groom himself, he suggested various other family members - until he remembered the "no family" rule. Generously, he then said that if I wanted, I could marry Airi from the clinic. I politely declined.

"Can't girls marry?" he asked.
"Yes, they can," I replied. "It's just that I dont want to marry Airi from the clinic. And I'm fairly sure she doesn't want to marry me."      
"Don't you like her?"
"Yes, I do like her..." I said
"Well why don't you want to marry her then?" he asked, confused.

I then explained that you could only be married to one person at a time, so if he was already marrying Airi she wouldn't be free anyway.

"Oh, ok then," Niko said. "You'll have to find someone else."
I now realised that having gone through most people that he had ever met, Niko was fast running out of options.
"Who do you suggest then Niko?" I asked, amused.
"Just go to ABC," he said. "You'll find someone there."

So there we have it. I always knew that Somero was a special place, but it's taken this long to realise that any woman wanting a husband can simply pick one up from our local petrol station. This will come as a relief to many of my single friends, and may well attract a number of extra visitors to Somero. Not to mention the amount of weddings we need to start planning....looks like it's going to be a busy summer :)

Dance Cruise with Sekahaku

Raija Nieminen from Sekahaku and Antti-Ville Heikkilä

It's late on Sunday night as I write this and I won't have any trouble falling asleep tonight.  I reckon I have spent about a third of the last twenty-four hours dancing...which in my book is about the best possible way to spend a weekend.

This time the occasion was a cruise from Turku with a dance organisation called "Sekahaku."

Sekahaku have more than 1,500 members - all people who love dancing from around the Turku area and beyond. They organise classes, dance events and cruises like this one which combine social dancing with the opportunity to learn some new steps. 

There was free dancing last night and several times during the day, in addition to three classes in Bugg and Fusku from our teacher Antti-Ville Heikkilä this morning. I have been to a few classes since arriving in Finland, but Antti was one of the best teachers I have come across. Why? He was funny, patient, very clear - and he comes from Oulu, which is always a good thing!
So, if you are thinking of getting your dancing shoes on, you can look him up here - www.pilketta.fi.

I went on this cruise without knowing anyone beforehand, but the atmosphere was friendly and welcoming from start to finish, which made it very easy both to find dance partners and to make new friends.

It's never too late to start dancing, especially if you live in Finland, as there are opportunities everywhere you go. So if it's something you've thought about doing but never got round to, get your dancing shoes on and start moving. There's no better way to get rid of the winter blues.